I have to admit, I am not immune to the occasional fraud sneaking his way into my heart. Here's a real winner of a tale. It's not int he least bit funny.
I was on OKCupid one night and noticed that a very handsome guy looked at my profile. He had two professional photos, one with a wedding ring on, with a caption that read, "Don't worry, I'm not married. I posed for an ad for my friend." I decided to say hello to him on chat. He was incredibly friendly, we talked about ourselves, and he asked me to text him. We began texting back and forth and learning about each other.
I quickly learned that he's Italian, has 7 sisters, works in the computer field, has gone to hackers conventions, is into geeky things, and finds me to be very pretty. He's friendly, smart and interesting to talk to. He's never done online dating before, and I would be the first person he would meet from online. He doesn't have a Facebook because he's "never been into it," and he knows people find that very strange. He knows I'm dating a few people and wants to "win me over" from them. I show him my blog and he wants to "take me out on a bad date." He wants to make his way into my blog, and says I can even post his pictures in here.
A few days into our correspondence, I ask him when he wants to meet up. He says, "Oh, I didn't tell you I'm going to New York for business? I'll be back in 2 and a half weeks." We continue corresponding daily, and he is immediately very into me, telling me how pretty I am, how smart and funny I am, that he wants to make out with me, that I'm so pretty that if he met me he would be so nervous he'd probably "spill water all over himself or something." I've been lonely lately and he was beginning to charm me. Initially I resisted, saying that he doesn't know me, that attraction can only be known from meeting in person, that we may not like each other if we actually meet. But he kept insisting that he feels like he already knows me, that I'm so pretty, that he knows he likes me.
He even went so far as to tell me that he has 23 nieces and nephews, and that if we get together I have to be prepared to write lots of holiday cards.
For a few days I bought into it, living in the fantasy world he was spinning, smoking from the same crack pipe as him. I was feeling anxious about the situation, not knowing if I was attracted to him or not, yet allowing him to talk so romantically to me anyway, so I kept asking him to send me more pictures. He told me he only has pictures on his computer at home, that he travels with a less expensive computer, and that his phone isn't letting him send photos. He also didn't want to Skpe with me. "Just meet me first, then we can Skype after."
I awoke one morning feeling like I came out of a dream. I sent him a message which read, "I find it retarded that you won't send me pictures of you. Even if you phone isn't sending photos, you can take a photo and email it. You're an IT guy, you can figure it out." He asked if I was mad at him and I told him I didn't want to text anymore, to just call me when he can. I talked to a few of my friends about him and they all had the feeling that he was lying about who he said he was. He wouldn't send me pictures, he magically was in NY when I asked to see him, he was wearing a wedding ring in a photo, he didn't have a Facebook account. Things did not add up.
We spoke on the phone late that night. He told me that he can be selfish, and he feels uncomfortable sending me more photos. I went through everything I had been talking to my friends about that day-- that for women, online dating can be vulnerable, and these things aren't matching up, and I'm concerned he's not who he says he is. I ask him point blank if he's the guy in the photos and he responds that he is. He apologizes, says he's never done online dating before, says he's going to send me a picture the next day and that he feels really embarrassed. We talk about meeting when he returns from his trip, and he suggests I bring a friend to meet him to "make me feel more comfortable." After we get off the phone, he sends me text massages in Italian, saying he's sorry, he feels so stupid and is embarrassed to talk to me.
A few days go by and I hear nothing from him. No picture. No text messages or phone calls. I message him asking how he is and I hear nothing.
Today I sent him a message asking him to communicate with me and I hear nothing back. So I decide to take matters into my own hands.
I find out that you can search an image by dragging it into Google Images. I did this and found.....
That the images he sent me are of a married opera singer from across the country. And not only has he used this guy's image, but many many other people have as well. I'm starting to think this is like some image that computer hackers or geeky dudes use to pretend like they are a hot hunky dude.
I search his email addresses, and find him writing about computer stuff 6 years ago, so I'm guessing he didn't lie about that part. A very irrational side of me emerged and I called and emailed him a few times, letting him know that I was onto him, sending him links to prove that I can see what's up. He closed down his email account and didn't answer his phone.
So now I'm left with not knowing who this person is at all, concerned that some psycho is going to knock down my door. But the most logical explanation is that he's just some lonely nerdy dude who wanted to try to get me to like him by getting to know him first, meeting him, and seeing how far he could go. Or he never intended on meeting me and just wanted to write me. Whatever the case may be, the internet is a wild and scary place at times, for psychos to roam free and pray on the innocent. Be careful out there people, learn from my stories.... Now I'm wishing I would have been more careful.
And last but not least, his desire has been fulfilled... Here are his "pictures," posted in my blog.
Thankfully I was spared from his "bad date".... I can only imagine what that would have been like and shudder.
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